Saturday, 31 October 2009

"Our Target Is The World"

The final part of the Chronicles of Torture is here! Don't expect all to end in happiness...

Jake ran, on and on through the tunnel, the clatter of the soldiers boots behind him yet distant. He knew he was near the surface; he had been running for 30 minutes and would not rest until the guards had given up. But they would not stop so quickly, for they knew of worse fates than death. The only thing Jake could do was run.

After another ten minutes of running, Jake finally stopped. He couldn't go on like this, running from Tommy's guards. He was so worn out, he didn't care if he were caught sooner of later. It was only then did he realise that there was no noise; not footsteps, no voices, nothing save the sound of his breath and his heartbeat, a strong thud in his ears.

Maybe this is not the end, maybe I will get out of here after all. But what then? I can't just return to my original life, can I? Is it really better to hide for the rest of my years or face the consequences of what I have done?

Jake stood. He had made up his mind. Drawing on reserves of energy, he began to run up the tunnel and hopefully to the near surface.


Tommy was furious. If Jake was not caught, then they would be ruined. Black Row would be shut down, but, more importantly, The Plan would never work. He could not allow this to happen.
"Sir, what must be done?"
"Execute the guards who lost him, drown them in Acryllic Paint. Then find all of Jakes' close family. If he does not come out, then they will suffer. Also, arrange a trip to the surface."


Sunlight. After the cold darkness of the underground, it stung his eyes and burnt his skin. But he was grateful. Jake had discovered the secret of Black Row, faced the might of Tommyfer Lawdry and lived to the tale. As he knew he must. The Police and even the Government must know what he knew, or he would soon be sent back to the Chamber. But there was one thing he had to do first. He had to make sure his family was alright.

Blood. There was an iron stench of it in the air, even before Jake opened the front door that had been snapped in half and was barely hanging on its hinges. He slowly walked inside, and the first thing that he saw was a message written on a wall. A message written in blood.

"Visit your office block, be there by 10pm. For every ten minutes that you are late, one of your family will die."

Jake could do nothing else. He had to go. Misery and defeat crept over him. He knelt down and cried.


"9:59, and still no sign of him. Face it, Boss, he isn't going to be here."
"Give him the last minute. If he doesn't turn up, kill his family members, one by one."

Tommy was pacing the Office, waiting for Jake. He was not a patient man, and the current situation had stressed him out a lot. If Jake did not turn up, all was lost.

"Ok, Tommy, here I am. I haven't told anyone about your secret, so let my family go."

Jake stood in the doorway, facing Tommy. He would not let his family die because of his greed.

"Good choice, Jake. Guards, burn the building and leave the family here. Jake," Tommy stared into his eyes "You're coming with me".

"You traitor! You said my family would be alright if I came!"

"I DID NOT SAY SUCH A THING! Now, follow me."

Tommy led the way out of the building and into a car. Jake got in. After a few minutes, fire burnt through Jakes' old work place.

"Jake, you know what we are doing, but you think that we will just take the Government, hmm? No, you are wrong. It is not just the Government, not just the county. No, our target is the world."

Jakes' body was found on the 3rd November, cleverly concealed in a bush of thorns near the Thames. When he was examined for a cause of death, all that could be suggested was an extremely high pressure, for all his bones were nothing but powder. Black Row had taken its revenge, and its secret was still a secret. Jake was not the first, nor will he be the last.


Kaytei: Richard! That ending was horrible!

Ultimate Master Zaros: What do you mean?! I spent ages on that!

Tommy (Lawson): Why, why WHY am I always the evil guy?

Mark: Hey everybody! I can comment again! But I must admit, Richard, that ending was really weird.

Kaytei: Yes, Richard, I completely agree with Mark.

Mr Staples: Woo! I recently made my 100th post! Nothing will stand up against me, especially not Tea and Toast, minky bum chocolate!

Kaytei: WHAT!?!? One does not like being referred to as Minky Bum Chocolate! But Richard, will you PLEASE change the ending?

Richard: Fine! Give me a minute.

Jakes' body was not found in a bush of thorns near the Thames. No one knew what Black Row was planning.

Richard: Better?

Mark: It adds suspense, and creates a feeling that it shall, one day, be continued. Boody Boody Boody Boo!

Tommy: I agree with Mark, but 'Boody Boody Boody Boo'? Wft?!?

Kaytei: Yes, Richard, I also agree with Mark. Thank you for changing it.

Richard: No problem. Now, everyone must wait for the Shattered World!!! Mwuahahahahahaha!!!

Friday, 30 October 2009

Don't look behind you, that's where they hide...

As it may be completely obvious by now, Mark Geranium can COMMENT AGAIN!!!! YAY!!! CHEESE FOR EVERYBODY!!!!!!!! Wait, scrap that, cheese for no one. Something else that I cannot fail to mention is that Mark now has permission to post on Dementia. And who said that eagles couldn't fly? *Cough* Tommy *Cough*

In other news, where is the last part of the Chronicles of Torture? Is it coming later? Will it be here any minute now? Or is it in your wardrobe, under the spare pair of Chicken Pies you bought and never intended to use? Maybe.

Also, if you want to post on Mania, please send a message to, requesting membership. I know at least one person who wants to join...

Monday, 26 October 2009

The Smashed Earth...



"The world, it's all smashed up, like!"

"What the bladdy 'ell are you talkin' about?"

"Last night, a bunch of zombie types walked along and smashed up the Earth!"

"Dey smashed up the Earth?"

"They sure did. Guess we're gonna have to run away."


"Because the zombies are man-eatin', and we're next on the menu!"

"I thought they were vegitarian!"

"Well they're not."

(Sound of a zombie breaking in, and eating someone)



"You're all dead like!"

"I know. What a bummer."

"Bollocks. Guess you can't watch the football, now you're dead."

"Guess not."

"Wait a sec, where did the zombie go?"

"Oh he disappeared like. Zombieses is like werewolves - when they bite somewun, the person becomes a zombies as well."

"What, so you're now a zombie?"

"Guess so."


Zaros then woke up. It turned out the whole conversation had all been a strange dream.

"Ah well," he said to himself "I've got a good idea for the next part of the Shattered World."

To be continued...?

Sunday, 18 October 2009

I have a box of Maltesers here...

...and if you can get to my house in 5 minutes, you can have one. Like that will ever happen; Mr Staples is the only one who knows where I live. Mark told me how to put a video on here. Let's hope it will work...

Wednesday, 14 October 2009

The Shattered World, and another little Surprise...

I had to put the video on YouTube, even though it was close to working :( On the other hand, it's my first solo video, so I hope it doesn't waste anyones time (looking at you, Kaytei). As for the surprise, you'll just have to wait and see... :) This SHOULD take you to the video, located on one Tube of You. It could take time to load, so you might want to watch it again. You might even want to vote it at 5 stars because you can't see the better invisible part!

Sunday, 11 October 2009

Chronicles of Torture, Part - 4

Sorry about the delay. I originally hoped to get this out by 1pm, but my brother was working.

Jake tried to take in what he was told. He was going to die, and Lawdry wanted to make it as painful as possible. He was being led down many corridors, each on taking him further down, judging by the ramped areas. Then they came to a stop at a sign that read

As they passed, Tommyfer quickly signalled to two guards who raised an M249 SAW each. They nodded and lowered their guns as Tommy led Jake into a strange room. If you could call it a room. It was more like rounded chamber filled with strange machinery. As Tommy walked out, he closed a door behind him. Nothing work get through it.
His voice was magnified into the chamber.

"Here we are, Jake. The last few moments of your life before they are snuffed out. I remember doing this to someone not long ago, though I used different means then. I think it was...oh yes! I drowned them in acyrillic paint. This time, though, you shall be crushed to death by an extremely high pressure."

Jake smiled, then burst into laughter.

"What, do you think it's funny?" All the gentleness in Tommy's voice had gone. "Funny, when you take a breath and feel the paint running down your throat? Funny when you feel it hardening inside your lungs and choking you to death?"

"No, I wasn't laughing at the paint. It's just, well, a High Pressure Generator doesn't exist. There is no technology possible of doing that."

"Oh, but Jake, I'm afraid to say there is. Turn it on, level one to start with."

Jake suddenly went dizzy, the whole room spinning around him. He felt the same pressure against his bones as he had earlier that day, about 7 hours ago. Like time had any meaning in this place though.

"Level Two"

The pressure increased. The machine began to hum and heat up, as if it had trouble maintaining this level of pressure. Level Three and Four were exactly the same, but with stronger pressure and more noise and heat.

"Level Five"

The machine emitted a high pitched noise, then part of the chamber exploded. It was a if there was a vacuum in the chamber; all the air being wrenched out by a massive gap in the wall. There was a tunnel on the other side. Jake instinctively ran towards it.

"Open the damn door! He musn't escape!" Lawdry was shouting, but he was too late. As soon as the door had opened, Jake had gone.

"Find him, he mustn't escape. He knows too many of our secrets, we cannot let him live anymore". Tommy signalled to the guards to begin their search. Then a thought hit him, and he changed his orders.
"Bring him to me. I want him alive."

Saturday, 10 October 2009

It'll be soon...

Don't worry, I haven't given up on the Chronicles of Torture (yet), but the next part should come out tomorrow. For those who don't know when tomorrow is, it'll be Sunday. If you can find this hidden speech, you must know how my mind works. And if Tommy reads this, or someone tells him, WRITE ON YOUR BLOG OR I EAT YOU WITH CHEESY PEAS FOR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It'll be soon...

Tuesday, 6 October 2009

I'm Back

That's right; after a few days of being ill, I am finally well enough to return to school WITHOUT (hehehe) infecting anyone. No worries, because it's almost certainly gone (unless any of you revive it in me). If you do, I'll bite you.